Many people are fearful of marriage because of their observation of many failed matrimonies. Precisely, marriage is troublesome because God has designed great blessings in 2 people coming to be one. Jesus said He will be in the midst when two or more are in agreement. Marriage is not just two persons gathered together or in agreement, but the Power & Ability of the two persons are now literally one! Now we know why Satan prefers to instill disagreements in marriages. Mat 18:20 For where two or three are gathered together in My name, I am there in the midst of them..
God wants us to experience abundant life in our marriages. The devil is very subtle to make people accept his evil ways. The devil desires to snare you with fear, perhaps he will suggest to you that you are not being loved, that you have been cheated, fear of being fooled, being short changed in a marriage. By entertaining fear, speaking your fear, you are unknowingly meditating on fear. Like faith, fear is a spiritual force, if you meditate on fear, feeding on fear, believing in your fear, your fear will manifest.
Ask any divorce person who will tell you they began to say “divorce” long before it really happen. There is something fatal about that word. That word divorce is not of God; God is for union, not divorce. So if you ever meditate on that demonic word, you will empower the word by your own effort. What you say is what you get. Proverbs 18:21 – death and life are in the power of the tongue, and they that love it shall eat the fruit thereof.
You must never speak words that you don’t want to be part of your life. Wife, don’t say stuff like: “my husband is a useless bump”. Husband, don’t say things like: “my wife is heartless and mean”. You’re actually slapping yourself when you say that because you chose your own spouse, your spouse is actually one with you, your own flesh, your two spirits are one too. You are hurting your own self, your own prosperity, and your own future successes.
Having understood the enemy’s destructive plan, don’t wait until your marriage is perfect to enjoy it. It will never happen, and that is the beauty of marriage. Many looks forward to a perfect state – it is not Biblical. God’s plan is for us to live for now and seize the now moment. He is the Great I am, not I was or I will be. It is the trials of life in a marriage make the engraving in a relationship, giving it more life colors, shapes, excitements and memory.
Another enemy of marriage is self-righteousness. Underlying self-righteousness is fear of being unfairly treated. But God says that our righteousness is like rag, instead of boasting our righteousness, we should boast on the One who gives us His Righteousness, Jesus Christ. If you insist on exerting your own righteousness in a marriage, then in effect, you have removed God from your marriage equation. When we work God rest, when we rest God work.
Every husband needs a wife to build him up – not tear him down. Every wife needs a husband to protect & love her. Surely, there are more good things in your mate than the bad things! Encourage each other, stop your sarcasms, learn to say “I am sorry” and “I forgive you”. When the tension is building up, do not react immediately, pause for 10 seconds; by acting to defer anger, we may be avoiding the snare of the devil.
Proverbs 3:5-6 Trust in the Lord with all your heart, lean not unto your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct your paths.
It is not how good your husband, or how good your wife is, but it is how good God is! While you we’re still sinners, Christ died for us. He had taken our place, so that we can take His place. And thus, Christ had taken all your fears away, you need not have to succumb to any more fears; He is with you, He is in you, He is for you and He will work through you! Hallelujah, what is there for you to fear anymore?. You cannot stop the birds from flying over your head, but you can stop the birds from building nests on your head… likewise: Fear may come to your mind, and you may be fearful at the spur of the moment, but you can still choose to reject the fear and fill yourself with the Love of Christ, and the goodness of Christ, and this will manifest into Faith effortlessly, even as small as a mustard seed, it is enough to move a mountain, Hallelujah. Never again will you confess fear, for God has not given you the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love and sound mind.
1Jn 4:18 There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, because fear involves torment. But he who fears has not been made perfect in love.
Perfect Love here is not your love for Christ but it refers to the Love of Christ that is truly perfect for you, as God is love. Fear has no place when we walk in love. Keep on feeding your ears and eyes with the messages of Grace, for the Gospel of Christ is the power of God into total wholeness of life. Just by hearing and reading the Good News about Christ, the perfection of His work, and the Loveliness of His person, you will be transformed effortlessly, into the same image of Christ, not by your own might but by the power of Holy Spirit.
Have a great life in Jesus!